Pre-Snap Read

Coaching Moves

The 2011 Locksley: Week 6

By Paul Myerberg   //   Oct 5, 2011

Just because the weather’s turning a big nippier doesn’t mean the seats are following suit. The seats are remaining hot, hot, hot — and in some cases, the mercury’s bubbling. How hot is Rick Neuheisel’s seat? It’s awful hot, like center-of-Kilauea-hot, and I implore you: use gloves, and handle with care. And Larry Porter, who has run an already-weak Memphis program nearly six feet under? You might not be paying attention, but Porter won’t last long if Memphis athletic director R.C. Johnson is shown the door in the near future, as some have suggested. How do you cool a hot seat, you might ask? Water doesn’t help. A fire extinguisher is useless, though they’re good fun in empty hotel hallways. You need to win, obviously — and these 10 coaches don’t do that, or don’t that nearly enough, to cool down their hot seats. Your coaching quote of the week comes from Baylor’s Art Briles, who wants his team to look ahead to Iowa State, not back to a tough loss to Kansas State:

“You got to stay tough. You got to stay focused. You got to stay hungry. What you can’t do is linger, because if you linger, you can’t have carry-over. We got a new job, a new season. Let’s beat Iowa State this week. That’s our job. That’s what we’ll do.”

1. Rick Neuheisel, U.C.L.A. (Last week: No. 1)

2011 record 2-3
Overall (since 2008) 17-25

The saddest part about U.C.L.A.’s 45-19 loss to Stanford on Saturday wasn’t the loss, and that’s what’s sad. You follow? The loss itself was completely and utterly expected — as was the lopsided margin — and that’s what’s sad. U.C.L.A. has a very nice fan base; not a rabid, foaming-at-the-mouth fan base like those at Oklahoma, Alabama and elsewhere, but a dedicated fan base that doesn’t deserve to travel to Palo Alto and expect an ugly loss. There’s a word for this: apathy. That’s another word for indifference, meaning you know what’s happening — you know your team is going to get crushed — but don’t really care. It’s time for the U.C.L.A. fan base to care again.

2. Larry Porter, Memphis (Last week: No. 2)

2011 record 1-4
Overall (since 2010) 2-15

Memphis scored 31 points on Saturday, which was a program-high under Porter. Pop the bubbly, right? Not yet: Memphis allowed 38 points in a loss to Middle Tennessee State, which was only the 11th-most points the Tigers have surrendered under Porter’s watch. Save the champagne for another day, boys. On Saturday, Memphis took one step forward, two steps back.

3. Frank Spaziani, Boston College (Last week: No. 10)

2011 record 1-4
Overall (since 2009) 17-15

This season is turning into a disaster for Spaziani and Boston College. Just through the first week of October, the Eagles have lost to Duke for the first time since 1927 and at home to Wake Forest for the first time since 2003. And before that, B.C. was absolutely manhandled by a U.C.F. team that went on, after that victory, to lose to F.I.U. and B.Y.U. in consecutive weeks. This isn’t the Titanic. It’s not the Poseidon Adventure. Boston College’s season is going down like the Andrea Doria: it’s not like no one thought the Eagles were unsinkable, but few thought things would go so foul, so fast. Someone will be held responsible; Spaziani will be the fall guy, and I won’t argue that it shouldn’t happen.

4. Neil Callaway, U.A.B. (Last week: No. 3)

2011 record 0-4
Overall (since 2007) 15-37

So the Blazers didn’t look terrible in their 24-23 loss to Troy, but a loss is a loss, and as much as anyone on this list, Callaway desperately needs a win. When is that win going to come? Not this Saturday, when U.A.B. hosts Mississippi State. At Tulsa on Oct. 15? Not with the way this offense is playing. Against U.C.F. on Oct. 20? I wouldn’t bet on it. Maybe Marshall to end October, but it might be too late at that point. See, Callaway needs six wins. The Blazers may very well be 0-7 by the time they head to Huntington to take on the Thundering Herd.

5. Rob Ianello, Akron (Last week: No. 8)

2011 record 1-4
Overall (since 2010) 2-15

It’s one thing to be terrible, which is something Ianello and the Zips do quite well, actually. It’s quite another to be really terrible, which is how you’d define Akron after its loss to Eastern Michigan on Saturday. Really. Terrible. In a sense, however, perhaps Ron English and E.M.U. can serve as a guiding light for Ianello and the Akron administration: Eastern Michigan hung with English after his own disastrous start, and the Eagles are 2-3 after the weekend’s win over the Zips.

6. Bob Toledo, Tulane (Last week: No. 6)

2011 record 2-3
Overall (since 2007) 15-38

Toledo has had little problem getting the Green Wave to 2-2. It’s after 2-2 — from games 5 through 12 — that Toledo and Tulane really lose their way. The slide, which seems inevitable, began in earnest this past weekend with a 45-6 loss to Army. The Cadets, who are also 2-3, were fresh off an ugly loss to Ball State. If you say that the Green Wave are 39 points worse than an Army team that’s 27 points worse than Ball State… you can probably say with some certainty that Tulane, once again, isn’t any good. New year, same story.

7. Dan Enos, Central Michigan (Last week: No. 4)

2011 record 2-3
Overall (since 2010) 5-12

Central Michigan’s win on Saturday was enormous. The defense was abysmal, yes. But the offense? The offense was superb through the air and on the ground, racking up 587 yards — a program-high under Enos — on 95 plays, going toe-to-toe with a far more experienced Northern Illinois offense and coming out on top. It was the sort of offensive explosion that was commonplace under Brian Kelly and Butch Jones, Enos’s predecessors, and it might just be the spark this team needs to challenge for a MAC division title and a bowl berth.

8. Houston Nutt, Mississippi (Last week: No. 5)

2011 record 2-3
Overall (since 2008) 24-19

Winning at Fresno State was a start. And beating the Bulldogs, 38-28, gets the dogs off Nutt’s heels, at least a bit. But Nutt won’t officially take himself off the hot seat unless he begins taking games in SEC play, a quest that recommences with a home date with Alabama on Oct. 15. And continues with Arkansas a week later. And Auburn seven days after that. If the Rebels get swept, they’ll need a perfect November merely to reach bowl eligibility. Waiting in November? That would be Kentucky, Louisiana Tech, L.S.U. and the Egg Bowl.

9. Tom O’Brien, N.C. State (Last week: N/A)

2011 record 2-3
Overall (since 2007) 27-28

I respect O’Brien’s inflexibility, if that makes sense. O’Brien said that Russell Wilson would no longer be part of the program if he didn’t participate in spring drills. Wilson didn’t participate in spring drills; O’Brien said he was no longer part of the program. No waffling, no second-guessing — by O’Brien himself, anyway — and no deviating from his decision. I respect that. That doesn’t mean it wasn’t a stupid decision then or a ridiculously rash decision today, as Wilson is showing his true worth in leading Wisconsin into the national title hunt while the Wolfpack struggle with the start of A.C.C. play. I wrote over the summer that O’Brien’s decision would place him firmly under a microscope should his team struggle without Wilson. His team is struggling; O’Brien is under a microscope. And on a hot seat.

10. Mike Sherman, Texas A&M (Last week: N/A)

2011 record 2-2
Overall (since 2008) 21-21

Here’s a scary thought: Sherman’s 21-21 record through his first 42 games at Texas A&M is actually one game worse than Dennis Franchione’s mark in College Station over the same span. His Big 12 mark is similarly one game worse than Franchione’s over 42 games. And Sherman, like Franchione, has been prone to the sort of coaching misjudgments that send fans to the exits, light up sports radio talk lines and raise legitimate questions about his ability to lead A&M into the upper tier of the Big 12. And with the SEC looming, Sherman needs to get his act together — 60 minutes of football, please — before the calls for a change reach a fever pitch. For now, Sherman is simply on notice: get your act in gear. It could get worse.

Dropped out

Paul Wulff, Washington State (Last week: No. 7)
Mark Richt, Georgia (Last week: No. 9)

Previous lists

Week 5 list Rick Neuheisel, No. 1

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Tags: Bob Toledo, Dan Enos, Frank Spaziani, Houston Nutt, Larry Porter, Mike Sherman, Neil Callaway, Rick Neuheisel, Rob Ianello, The Locksley, Tom O'Brien

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